1. I was too lazy to look up what dulcimer meant when I read it too. However, I just looked it up and apparently it is a stringed instrument played with "light hammers" like this highly fashionable man is demonstrating:
In spite of now knowing the definition of dulcimer, I still don't understand the quote. I guess we'll have to wait and see.
2. You're right. The story is really beautifully written. I liked that quote about the earnest labor of the earth too.
Discussion Questions:
Q: In the early pages of the book, while driving to the Midwest with all of her belongings in tow, Betta finds an unexpected freedom and relaxation. What does moving, or even driving, have to do with this release Betta feels?
Driving is a good time for contemplation, especially when you're driving alone, because it forces you to be still (though you're moving...paradoxical, huh?) and your thoughts start to wander. I think it is a time for Betta to really explore her thoughts about her husband's death. She clings to the thought that he is everywhere, which allows her to reconnect with him through nature.
Also, I think moving affords freedom and relaxation for Betta because it's something new and exciting. It sounded like after her husband's death she spent most of her time in their home by herself not really doing much. By going through with moving to the Midwest like she had planned, she was able to leave her house and get a fresh perspective that allowed her to make sense of life and death.
It was hard for me to read Chapter 2 as well. It made me cry. Of course I was imagining what it would feel like if I had to go through that with Henry, and I really, really hope I never do. I think he would be much better at handling my death than I would his. Too much estrogen floating around up in here.
Q: Do you think Betta has made a mistake in forsaking her friends for the intensity of a lifetime with John? How do you balance the intimacy of a partner and children with female friends in your own life?
This is an interesting question. To me it's not unimaginable to think that someone could get so involved in their marriage and family at the expense of their other friendships. As I was reading that part I thought, "Man, I hope that's not me." When your husband is your best friend and you get so caught up in the business of life, it's easy to neglect friendships unless you make an effort. And like any relationship, friendships require nurturing. I don't think I'm the best example of how to balance the intimacy and female friends. I really wish I called you guys more just to talk and keep in touch. But even when we don't talk for a while, when we meet up it feels like we haven't missed a beat. I think the key is making time for each other. Girl time is necessary. An annual weekend get-away sounds like a good idea. And yes, I think it is a mistake that Betta lost complete touch with her female friends. The conversation she had with her Boston neighbor was awkward. Really sad that she didn't have someone closer to share her sorrow in her time of need.
Alli's question: Why does her name switch between Bette to Betta all the time? It's kinda annoying how they don't explain that...
I've read through the first three chapters now. Sumi, you're probably done with the book. I like this Q&A format. Keep it up, Sumi!
Love,
alli
No comments:
Post a Comment